


to kiss the tender inward of thy hand

by kingstonsrabbit



Category: Doctor Who RPF
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-09
Updated: 2014-09-22
Packaged: 2018-01-04 04:03:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1076320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingstonsrabbit/pseuds/kingstonsrabbit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rumor had it, Anthony Kingston had more money than the Tzar itself. Therefore marrying his offspring would assure his estate to stand for entire generations to come.  Not even two days into the season, Matthew expressed to both families, the Smith's and the Kingston's, his desire to court the young lady. </p><p> </p><p>Title from Shakespeare's Sonnet 128</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_Lord Matthew Robert Smith of Northampton and Miss Alexandra Elizabeth Kingston are to be wed tomorrow._

 

Alex read the two lines one more time. The crisp paper of the newspaper was rough under her soft fingers and the black ink was already coating her fingertips.

She was getting married the following day and that Miss would turn into something quite a bit more sophisticated. In less than twenty-four hours she'd become Lady Alexandra Smith, wife of the Earl of Northampton. She had been raised for this position or at least for one of equal prestige in the States and finally hours away for achieving it, she felt empty and not as happy and fulfilled as she thought she would. Agreeing to a loveless marriage, a mere business transaction more than an actual wedding, wasn't what she was looking for when she had begged her father to spend the season in London, to look for some fun and a British gentleman to marry. It was all her fault though. She was the one who had insisted on entertaining the Earl of Northampton's offer to wed him and trade her fortune for a chance at a countess' coronet. She had had her queue of suitors back in America, but she had always wanted to aim higher. Therefore it was her fault if the night before her wedding, she didn't feel happy nor satisfied with her decision. 

She blew the last of the candles and laid down in bed, hoping that maybe, after a good night's sleep, what she was doing with her life would feel right.

 

* * *

 

 

Just a month before the start of the London season, the Smith family had found itself in front of the most tragic of things: the loss of its Lord. Lord Smith, Count of Northampton, had left his family after an illness that had deteriorated him in a matter of weeks, leaving a young Matthew, his only son, in charge of everything. It wasn't even twenty-four hours after his father's death that the new Lord had to come face to face with another problem: the latest investment made by his father has been a mistake and his beloved estate was on the brick of disaster.

With the season not too far away, the only solution young Matt could find was restoring to a loveless but wealthy marriage to save his family, his title, his estate and when he met the young and beautiful Miss Kingston, he had thanked God for his luck.

 

Alexandra Elizabeth Kingston was unconventionally attractive, so very different from the young women he had seen around the streets of London. With her golden mane of hair, her wide, green and cat-like eyes she had bewitched the young British gentlemen around her. To Matthew she looked like an untouched, pure, innocent flower in her green and blue gown, but her eyes had a twinkle in them and the richness of her laugh had everyone enchanted. She was pleasant to talk to and some had told him she was also quite the flirt and had a sharp tongue. But those faults, if they might be considered such, were quickly obscured by her large fortune.

This bright young lady had come to London at the right time. Precious young thing with a dowry worth more than Matthew's estate had ever seen, she had proved herself perfect for the role of Countess. The only downside to some people was her nationality: American. Not that Matthew minded, but the narrow minded members of his family and society had something quite rude to say about it.

 

Matthew had seen her every single day since the moment her boat had arrived in London. She had attended every party and dinner and so had the young Lord, doing his best to welcome her to England, to make her feel at ease and in the meanwhile he gathered information about her family and their wealth. Apparently both her parents and herself were born in Surrey and moved to America during her first year of life. Once they had moved there, they had easily and quite fastly become one of the richest dynasties, if one could call them such, to ever grace American soil and maybe even European. Rumor had it, Anthony Kingston had more money than the Tzar itself. Therefore marrying his offspring would assure his estate to stand for entire generations to come. Not even two days into the season, Matt had expressed to both families, the Smith's and the Kingston's, his desire to court the young lady.  

* * *

 

When Alexandra entered the ballroom, men and women turned around to look at her. Their eyes followed her every move as she quietly walked towards the other young women. Her golden skin contrasted with the pale English ladies around her and so did her hair: Matthew had never seen such a mass of dark blonde corkscrew curls. It was kept away from her lovely face by a simple pin at the nape of her neck. Her small hands gripped the wine glass and her fingers moved following the rhythm of the soft music in the background. 

Spotting her father conversing on the other side of the room, Alexandra waved her hand at him, receiving a smile in return. Matthew, who was intent on discussing with Mr. Kingston, raised his own glass towards her in greeting before taking a sip. She blushed and diverted her eyes towards one of the women approaching her. Matt snorted behind his glass when he noticed said woman was his sister, who smirked at him as she made her way towards the young American.

 

“It seems like you have bewitched the Earl of Northampton.” a voice came from behind her. A tall brunette was smiling up at Alex. “Lady Laura Smith.” the woman introduced herself. “You must be the American everyone is so fascinated with. Oh, don't worry, I like you already. You are so refreshing. You have no idea how boring it'd have been without you to spice things up.” she continued. “Not that I think you're some sort of...” she started again, but stopped when Alex almost burst into laughter. “I'm sorry, I tend to rant a lot.”

“It's okay. Apparently I'm quite the exotic character and people either want to stay away from me or they keep inviting me to their house for tea.” Alex said with a small laugh. “Alexandra Kingston.” she introduced herlself.

“Then you must come and grace us with your presence one of these days.”

“Oh trust me, I'm more like you then you might believe. I was born here, raised in America but my parents are both from Surrey... I'm more British than some of these people.”

Laura laughed at that.

“That's quite true, Miss Kingston.” a third voice said.

“Mama...” Laura said as if she was scolding the older woman. “This is Miss Alexandra Kingston. Miss Kingston, this is my mother, the Dowager Countess of Northampton.”

Finally putting two and two together, Alex looked at the young man talking to her father and then back to the Countess, bowing her head slightly.

“Mama, I was telling Miss Kingston how enchanting Matty finds her.”

“Stop calling your brother like that, Laura. It's not proper.” the Dowager Countess commented drily, before turning to face Alexandra completely. “I'm afraid we might see more of each other in the near future. My darling son seems to be very keen on you, Miss Kingston.” the older woman concluded, walking away and disappearing through the crowd.

“Don't listen to mama. She's always like that.” Laura tried to apologize.

“Always this rude?” Alex said over her glass of wine.

“I'm afraid so.”

The brunette patted her arm lovingly, before dragging her away from the noisy crown and towards the patio. 

“It's okay. I have been here for some days and not everyone has treated me as kindly as you do.” Alex replied, silently thanking Laura for walking them outside, away from prying eyes. “They know I'm American, they think I'm this exotic creature with an awful lot of money...”

“Well, aren't you?” Laura asked, trying to stifle her laughter. 

“I guess I am...” Alex continued with a laugh of her own. “But I can read what they're really thinking.” she paused, looking down the immense gardens. “They wonder how is it that I'm not out in the woods scavenging for food, plucking fruit from trees or fishing in my altogether on the river Thames.”

“Mama might think that, but we sure don't.” said a male voice. From the shadows, a dark, tall figure emerged. Matthew Robert Smith, Earl of Northampton, was definitely quite the sight. Tall, lean, with impossibly green eyes and a face that Alex, or anyone really, could ever forget.

“Sis, your husband wants to see you.”

“I'm not sure that's true.” she paused, looking at him as if she knew exactly what his plan was. “Someone's supposed to chaperon two young things like you.”

“I'm sure I can handle your brother, Lady Smith.” Alex piped up. 

“Oh, I'm sure you can, Miss Kingston. That's why we're going to get along famously.” Laura said, before kissing her brother's cheek , offering a cordial smile to the other woman and disappearing back into the building.

Matthew joined her by the terrace. The gardens were alight with a million lights from the small torches illuminating the various paths around the trees and bushes. 

“They told me you were gorgeous...”

“I'm afraid I can't say the same thing” came her reply.

“Yeah, I do have a peculiar face.” he said, puffing his chest and stroking his chin.

They stared at each other for some time before bursting into laughter.

“Walk with me?”

“Sure, but I shall warn you... what I told your sister is true: I can handle a young boy like you”

“Really?” he said with a smirk. 

“Not that way, milord!” Alex replied, with a smirk of her own and no sign of blushing. “I have a brother and three cousins. I grew up with them and therefore I know how to defend myself.”

“I've never doubted you would be any different, Miss Kingston.”

* * *

 

 

What went on between Alex and Matthew in the next few weeks was nothing but polite greetings and cordial conversations. No chaste kisses or stolen touches like in the novels. They were both aware of their role in society, marry well and produce an heir, and too preoccupied of what people might say about this union. Their courtship, therefore, was nothing extraordinary, not that anyone expected it to be something grand.

 

He needed the money and she wanted a title. Neither of them were in it for love.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

Two weeks into the London season, Matthew had officially informed his family of his decision to marry the young Kingston girl. Her mother had never approved of the union but after a rather embarrassing moment at her favourite boutique, she had repented herself and decided to at least shut up about the matter. Laura, on the other hand, was sure the young heiress would make a perfect bride for her little brother.

 

While his mother and sister called for the young Miss and her mother to tea, Matthew had slowly walked Mr. Kingston towards the large library in their London house. Mr. Kingston had proved himself to be a simple man, all smiles and gentle words but when Matthew had expressed his desire to marry his only daughter, the older man had sobered up and explained to his lordship that he knew about his financial problem and that all he wanted of the young man was to make his daughter as happy as he could and provide her with every single thing she needed. Much to Matthew's surprise, he had threatened to call his lawyers and other acquaintances that would surely make his life a living hell.

 

That night, on Alexandra's ring finger the Smith's family heirloom shone bright under the moonlight.

 

* * *

 

Their marriage felt more like business transaction rather than an actual wedding; a real act of legal theft as Mr. Kingston had described it to his wife and daughter. All her money had been devoted to her future husband's estate in order to save the Smith Abbey, its land and its residents from ruin.

 

Alexandra Elizabeth Kingston had, in simpler words, been their saviour.

 

But what had she gained from it? A title and a lonely room in the vast building. It had been her decision ultimately to accept the lord's proposal of marriage, but how could she refuse? She would have made herself look like a fool. She had come to England to marry for a title and for money; she had never believed in a union of love, so who was she to complain now? It was her own fault if she now found herself in the drafty abbey, an ocean away from her family and from all the people she loved and loved her back.

 

Alexandra sighed, applying lotion on her hands, while her maid arranged her hair for the night. Upon seeing the young woman struggling to fit the curls into a plait, Alex chuckled gently.

 

“I'm afraid taming my hair is quite the hardship.” she told the maid, who looked chastised. “Here, let me show you... I've had more experience with it than you. You'll learn in no time.”

 

“I'm sorry, milady.” the poor girl said.

 

Alex stiffened a little, murmuring “lady” under her breath. Just a few hours before she had been declared married to Lord Smith and had become a Lady. Her newly acquired title felt weird on her skin and definitely weighted on her shoulders.

 

“That's going to get some used to.”

 

“I know it's not my place to say it, milady but I'm sure you'll be a great countess.”

 

“How can you say so?” Alex asked with a smile. “Right now I feel quite lost.”

 

“I wasn't here when the now Dowager Countess became the Lady of the house, but my mother was. She works down in the kitchens but I heard her talking today with Mrs. Moffat. They both said you are more alike than your ladyship might think.”

 

Alex snorted.

 

“It's true, milady. She masked it well, still does. They say she was just as scared as you are now and she might be quite the bitter, old lady now-” both women giggled at that “-but her husband and her were great masters of this house.”

 

The red haired maid offered a ribbon to her mistress; the latter tied her hair in a plait.

 

“What's your name?”

 

“Miss Gillan, milady.”

 

Alex arched her brow, demanding more.

 

“Karen, milady.”

 

“Well then, Karen. I hope we can become friends. I'm afraid I'll feel lonely in this big house and I already feel highly inadequate so maybe you could help me figure things out.”

 

“With pleasure, milady.”

 

“We women need to stick together, don't we?”

 

“Yes, milady.” the girl said with a smile, before politely excusing herself from her ladyship's bedroom.

 

Alexandra stared at her reflection in the mirror, fixing some random curls which dared to escape the tight plait. She breathed deeply as she waited for her husband to appear from that door and claim what was now legally his. She knew he was in his chambers already; she saw him follow her upstairs, asking Mr. Moffat, the butler, to send Mr. Darvill up to ready him for bed.

 

So Alex waited for him half an hour, but the chair was becoming quite uncomfortable. She quietly moved to the settee and picked up a book she had nicked from the library. She sat down comfortably ad begun to read.

 

Half way through the eleventh chapter, she spared a look at the clock. It was almost 2 AM when Alexandra realized that she had been waiting pointlessly for her husband and that he had no interest in her whatsoever.

 

* * *

 

 

That morning when Alex woke up, the fire was already cracking in the fireplace and her dress for the day was already out on a chair with her jewels.

 

She stretched her back before ringing for her maid. Minutes later, Karen knocked on her door and entered the room with a breakfast tray.

 

“Good morning, Karen.”

 

“Good morning, milady. Is everything alright?” the maid asked, positioning the tray over her ladyship's legs.

 

“I'm not sure.” Alex mumbled under her breath and shifting to get herself more comfortable.

 

“Well, as far as I know and I don't know that much, it's normal to feel like that after one's wedding night.” Karen said gently, trying her best to hide her blush.

 

“I'm afraid that wasn't a real wedding night.”

 

“What do you mean, milady?”

 

“His lordship... well, my husband... he didn't come to my bedchamber as he was supposed to.”

 

Karen stared at her mistress with a mix of confusion and embarrassment.

 

“Well, I'm sure he was held up... what happened in the last few week have weighted a lot on his lordship.”

 

“When I married him I knew we weren't in it for love but I had hoped I at least interested him...” Alex shook her head and covered her disappointment with a frown. “I guess he was in it only for my money.”

 

“I'm sure it's nothing like that, milady.”

 

“Oh, I'm sorry Karen for laying such a burden on you.”

 

“It's no problem, milady.” the girl paused. “You said so last night. I do hope we can be friends.”

 

Alex sipped her tea, but Karen could see her eyes light up a little and the ghost of a smile grace the corners of her lips.

 

“Plus I'm Scottish, I can handle this.” the ginger haired maid continued.

 

This time Alexandra burst into laughter.

 

“So, what does your ladyship think of this dress?”

 

Glad she could put a smile on her mistress' face, Karen felt accomplished for the day.

 

* * *

 

Matthew sat at his desk in the library. With the newly weds as the only inhabitants of the house an only the minimum of servants at their service, the house was quieter than usual.

 

He wasn't exactly waiting for his wife to join him downstairs. Feeling extremely guilty because of what he had done, or better not done, the previous night, Matthew was afraid they'd reach a whole new level of awkwardness. He had chickened out at the last moment. Once his fingers had curled around the golden doorknob, he had felt awful. On the other side of the door, his wife was waiting for her husband to claim what was rightfully his, but he couldn't bring himself to do what society expected him to.

 

He had married that wonderful young woman for her money. He was using her and adding the act of taking _that something more_ from her felt too vile to him. So once he had convinced himself that remaining in his bedchamber was the most honourable thing to do, he laid down on the small bed in his dressing room and stared at the ceiling 'till tiredness and remorse overtook him.

 

Focused on the documents the bank had sent him, he didn't hear the soft, gentle footsteps coming closer. He was brought back to reality only when her rather small hand squeezed his shoulder.

 

“Good morning.” he said, managing to lose his balance while standing up from the chair and at the same time turning around to face her.

 

“Careful there, don't want you to fall over and knock your head off.”

 

Her hand reached out to steady him.

 

“Sorry, I'm quite clumsy.”

 

“Fenomenally so.” she replied without missing a beat.

 

Silence engulfed the room and the level of awkwardness spiked through the roof.

 

“Alexandra-”

 

“Matthew-”

 

They both laughed softly. She gestured for him to talk first and he coughed to clear his throat, mouth suddenly parched.

 

“You see... I... We need to talk.”

 

“We do.”

 

“And I wanted to give you a tour of the gardens before I leave after luncheon.”

 

“You're leaving?” she asked confused.

 

“Just for a day or two. I have to check on a couple of farmers on my, well, our land and then I'm off to London to finalize a contract”

 

“Oh.”

 

To say that Alexandra was disappointed was an understatement. They weren't even married for a day that he had to leave her all alone in this unknown place, she still couldn't bring herself to call home.

 

“I'm sorry about this, I really am. This is all new to me too.” he said, looking down at his feet. He suddenly took her hand in his and squeezed. “It's not been easy with my father passing away and then the estate almost in ruin...”

 

“I do know the feeling.” she replied.

The young couple smiled sadly at one another.

 

“Let me tell Moffat we're going for a walk, okay?”

 

Alexandra nodded. She kept looking at him as he dashed out of the library as gracefully as his limbs allow him to. Lord Smith was really rather handsome and has always been polite towards her and his touch always gentle.

Even if their relationship, their marriage, hadn't started with love, Alex was sure she had gotten lucky because it was better to have a husband as gentle and caring as Matthew, than one who ignored her completely.

 

The memory of the previous night still taunted her and Alex was rather hoping he'd give her an explanation.

 

* * *

 

The gardens were grand. He walked her though the different sections, describing with as many details as he could master the plants and various styles.

 

They walked for an entire hour before they stopped. They sat in front of a tiny pond where ducks swam quietly before ducking their heads underwater. Alexandra couldn't help but stare in fascination. She had never seen anything like this is America, nor in her short stay in London.

 

Matthew fell silent for the first time since they had left the house. His excitement had left place to the realization that this place was in his possession now. Silently promising himself that he'd do everything in his power to keep working on his father's project, he glanced at his wife.

 

She was gorgeous. With a wide smile gracing her face and the tiny, wild curls escaping their up-do, she looked radiant. For a fleeting moment, Matthew wanted to be the reason behind it.

 

“It's beautiful.” she finally said, breaking the silence.

 

“Yes, it is.” he agreed. “This place is all my life. When Laura and I were kids we would run away from our governess, Frau Bluecher, and hide in the grotto over the hill.” he said, pointing towards the small hill at their left.

 

“There's a grotto? I have never seen one!” she exclaimed in excitement.

 

“Oh but I can't show you all the gardens today. What will you do when I'm not here tomorrow?”

 

“I'm sure I can find something to amuse me.” she replied cheekily.

 

“I'm sure you could.” he replied with a small laugh. “Plus I'm sure my sister will make her appearance. I hope you don't mind.”

 

“How else am I going to handle your mother?”

 

“She's rather charming, isn't she?

 

“Delightful.” she continued. “I'm sorry, I shouldn't speak about your mother is such ways.”

 

“It's perfectly fine, Alexandra. My mother is quite a handful and you've been handling her obnoxious behaviour remarkably well.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Suddenly the ducks quack-ed, running towards their hidden sheltered nests and a thunder pierced the air, breaking the happy chirping of the birds.

 

“Oh no!” Matthew said, looking up at the sky. “Alexandra, we might want to start running this instant!”

 

“What?”

 

Her question was silenced by another thunder. One raindrop fell on her cheek and suddenly the couple found themselves in the middle of a thunderstorm.

 

Matthew took her hand and started running towards he direction of the grotto. Alex run behind him, one hand in his while the other held her dress up.

 

They reached the grotto in a matter of minutes. Both completely soaked, they leaned against the cold stone walls of the artificial cave to catch their breath.

 

When he lifted his eyes, she was still leaning against the stone, her head tipped back and her hair a wild halo around her face. Most of her curls had escaped the careful up-do she had been wearing, some were plastered against her face and neck, some stuck out at weird angles. Her mouth was slightly open and she took hungry gasps of air. Her chest heaved from the strenuous run towards shelter. He noticed her right hand then as it rested on the neckline of her dress, the warm palm against the soft skin of her chest. The other hand was still holding her gown, now dirty with mud and grass.

 

She was absolutely breathtaking.

 

That was the only thing in Matthew's mind as he cautiously walked towards her. His hands found their place on her hips, then around her waist. Her eyes darted open at his foreign touch. He saw fear flicker in them, but also determination and what he could swear was arousal.

 

She blinked once, twice, then his lips met hers in a fiery kiss, all passion and desire. She gasped lightly at the new feeling in her chest and deep in her belly. She could feel his tongue against her lips. It was all so very new to her; not that he hadn't kissed a man before. She had, secretly, under the apple trees at the summer house. It had been just a peck on the lips but she had felt so elated.

 

Next thing she knows, her hands have made their way around his neck, playing with the soft, silky locks of hair there. She felt cold and warm at the same time as she's pressed against the hard stone and the warmth of her husband's body.

 

When he backed away, she had to catch her breath. She felt as if she has just stopped running, but this time there's also a tingling feeling that screams at her that there should be more, that her body wants more. More what, she doesn't know yet.

 

Matthew wasn't looking at her anymore, shoulders slumped forward. He felt ashamed of himself, of his weakness. He had promised himself that he'd be a virtuous and honourable husband; he had made this promise only the previous night and he was already breaking it. What kind of a man was he?

 

He turned his back to his wife, walking just a few steps away from her. He felt dizzy, his mind foggy, but it's clear to him what his body wanted, what his instinct was aiming for. His shaft was hard, almost painfully so in his breeches, but he cannot do this. Not to her.

 

Alex stared at her husband as he walked away from her. Confused, she had no idea what to do nor what to say, but suddenly she just wanted to ask him. She wanted to know _the reason_.

 

“Why didn't you come to our room last night?”

 

Her voice was uncharacteristically strained as she was still trying to get her breathing back to normal.

 

“I obviously don't repel you.” she continued.

 

Matthew didn't reply, shaking his head. Minutes later, he turned around to face her one more time, with tears in his eyes.

 

“The reason why I married you makes me a despicable man and I want to make love to my wife, not to the young woman I married for her money.”

 

She flinched at that and he immediately stepped closer to her, his hands reaching for hers.

 

“No, no... you don't understand.” he continued. “You _are_ my wife.” he paused, smiling gently and squeezing her hands. “Right now everything is new to us and our marriage is something that we ought to work on together.”

 

Alex nodded.

 

“You're a very intelligent and beautiful woman, Alexandra, and I'm very lucky to have you as my friend for now.” he complimented her. “And I know that with time we can make this marriage _a real marriage,_ where I can be a real husband to you without feeling like I'm taking advantage of you any further _._ ”

 

“You're a good man, Matthew, and I would love to get to know you better before I can call you _my husband_.”

 

“Who says we can't be friend first?” he asked with a smile. “We might be already married, but I want to be someone you can trust, someone you can rely on. I want to be your friend before anything else.”

 

“I'd like that.” she said with a smile.

 

* * *

 

Half an hour later the rain stopped and Matthew and Alexandra made their way back to the house. Moffat was waiting for them in the parlour, walking up and down the length of the room in apprehension.

 

“Milord, milady, we were all worried.”

 

“We're perfectly fine, Mr Moffat.” Alex said, politely. “Could you send Miss. Gillan up to my room?”

 

“Sure thing, milady. Milord, should I call for Mr. Darvill as well?”

 

“Yes, thank you Moffat. Is everything ready for my departure?”

 

“Yes, milord, and luncheon will be served as soon as your lordship and her ladyship are ready.”

 

“Thank you.” Matthew said, walking towards the stairs. “Oh and Moffat?”

 

“Yes, milord.”

 

“Look after my wife, ay?”

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

She waved at Matthew as he hopped onto the car. His valet was just behind him, fastening the last of the luggages to the back of the vehicle. Miss. Gillan was by her side at her Ladyship request, but Alexandra had known from the first moment she had seen her maid interact with her husband's valet that there was something between the two of them.

 

Matthew and Alexandra had lunch together at the big old dining table. He talked about his trip and the things he had to squeeze in such little time before finally coming back home. He had even shown her a list of things she could do while he was away. He never mentioned what has happened hours before in the grotto though and Alex didn't know whether to be grateful for that or not. He had obviously surprised her: from the heated kiss to the grand speech after that. She had never expected him to be this considerate towards her: any other man wouldn't have cared that much for her honour and her feelings.

 

So lost in her thought, she almost didn't see him wave at her one last time as the engine gave a loud bang and started moving.

 

* * *

 

That night she couldn't sleep. The big, old house was scary and empty more so than the previous night. The servants were all in their quarters, while Alexandra was left all alone on the first floor.

 

As she laid awake in her bed, she could hear Matthew's dog make rounds in the hallways. She hadn't really minded about the animal since she had arrived at the Smiths' residence but had noticed that the quiet animal would follow his master around the house, trailing just few steps behind him, wagging his tail and sometimes daring to nuzzle his master's leg.

 

Quietly, Alexandra crawled out of bed and headed to the door. When she opened it, the wandering dog leaped towards her, all floppy years and gangly legs. The exuberant puppy nuzzled against her legs, seeking a caress or two. Its huge head nudged at Alex's hand, inviting her to do something.

Smiling gently and cooing softly, Alexandra knelt down to the ground and started scratching behind the dog's ears.

 

“Aw, who's a cute boy?” she said under her breath.

 

It was the early hours of the morning and the sunlight was slowly illuminating the grand abbey. She supposed the servants were getting ready to start their day and it was all for her. Feeling extremely guilty for rubbing other people of their time and hard work, she sighed and hoped that maybe once Matthew came back she could talk to him about her concerns.

 

“Idris! What are you doing here?” came a hushed voice that Alexandra recognized as Karen's Scottish brogue. “I'm sorry, milady. Mr. Moffat has been looking for his Lordship’s dog all night but it seems that Idris had other plans."

 

“It's okay, Karen.” she told her maid, before turning her attention back to the dog. “So you're a girl, sorry if I thought you were a boy... Now that I think of it, you're too pretty to be male.”

 

The dog kept licking and nipping happily at her hands.

 

“Why are you up so early, milady? Is anything the matter?”

 

“I'm fine, just couldn't sleep.” she said, standing up from her crouched position. “I just feel a little bit out of place.”

 

“Is there anything I can do for you, milady?” Karen asked ever politely.

 

“Stop calling me milady for a start.” Alexandra said with a smirk.

 

Karen blushed, but immediately piped up.

 

“I'm afraid if I do that, Mr. Moffat would throw a fit or get a heart attack.”

 

“Yes, that could definitely happen.” Alexandra said, entering her bedroom as Karen held the door open. “But I'd like if you called me by my name when we're alone.”

 

“Sure, ehm...”

 

“Alex.” she supplied, but at Karen's raised eyebrow she continued. “Short for Alexandra.”

 

“Shall I draw you a bath?”

 

“That would be lovely, Karen.”

 

As Karen fretted over her task, Alex laid down on the bed one more time, waiting.

 

She could survive for just a few days alone.

 

* * *

 

Just like Matt had predicted, his mother and sister showed up some time after luncheon to keep the young bride company.

 

Having tea with the one and only Lynn Smith was a hardship on everyone's part, especially on Alex's. Laura tried her best to restrain her mother, hold her back but the woman seemed to spit one mean comment after the other and she was always so blasé about it that Alexandra felt even more angered and frustrated.

 

They had finished their tea when Mr. Moffat entered the main library. Feeling a little relieved, Alex smiled at the older man as he quietly and diligently made his way towards the middle of the room.

 

“Will the Dowager Countess and Lady Laura be staying for supper?” he asked.

 

Alex stiffened at his question. Damn, she had completely forgotten about that so she did the polite thing to do.

 

“You're more than welcome to.” she said, fixing her eyes with Laura and then Lynn. “You can keep me company.”

 

Laura immediately nodded her head but Lynn's decision took a while. She scrutinized her newly acquired daughter-in-law before nodding stiffly at the butler.

 

* * *

 

Dinner was a sombre affair. Alex and Laura tried their best to keep a polite conversation going, but Lynn seemed to have made it her new aim in life to shut it down at every given chance.

 

After dinner, the three women moved to the sitting room for coffee. Laura and Alexandra sat on the sofa, chatting quietly, whereas the Dowager Countess sat herself on one of the plush armchairs in front of the fire.

 

“This dress is simply lovely on you, Alexandra. And the colour, it brings out your eyes and the colour of your skin.” Laura said, eyeing her sister-in-law. “Doesn't she look radiant, mama?” Alex blushed, shushing Laura and gently shoving her away. Laura merely swayed and grinned wider.

 

“Indeed, she does.” said Lynn tersely, not even bothering to turn around to face the two younger women. “It's a change from Laura's gowns. Hers are definitely more elaborate and of the brightest pink.”

 

“I like pink, mama, it's not a crime.” Laura commented, taking a sip of her coffee.

 

“I like your gowns, but I have never been too fond of pink.” Alex said.

 

“Oh Alexandra, you ought to have at least a pink dress! You would look simply enchanting.”

 

“I don't think I could pull of the colour like you do.”

 

“Want to bet on that?” Laura said with a wicked grin. “Know what, we're going upstairs now and you're going to try one of my gowns and you'll change your mind.” Laura said, standing up and stretching her hand towards Alex for her to take.

 

“I'm not sure I...”

 

“I'm not sure she'd fit into your gowns, Laura.”

 

Alexandra gasped.

 

“Mama...” Laura paused, looking at her mother sternly, before walking closer to her. “That is rude.”

 

“I'm just stating the obvious.” Lynn said nonchalantly. “Even if she were to keep her corset on, her bosom is way too big, her waist too small and her hips are definitely larger than yours.”

 

“Mama!” Laura cried in despair. “Alexandra...” she said turning towards Alex and when she saw something that she didn't expect, she gasped a little.

 

A lone tear fell from Alex's eyes, her fingers curled into her palms as anger overtook her.

 

“How dare you.” she said. “I know I have been married to your son only for two days, but how dare you insult me in my own house?”

 

“Alexandra! That is no way to speak to me.”

 

“Oh but it is.” the younger woman said, shaking her head and advancing towards her mother-in-law. “I partially understand your hatred towards me, I'm different from the other girls that fawned over your darling son. I put up with your insults and bitter behaviour during Matthew's and mine betrothal, but I thought that you'd change your mind once we got married, because as much as you don't want to believe this, I saved your family. My money saved your family and everything that you care for from disaster.” she paused, taking a deep breath. “I want you to leave my house, right now. I want you to think about how you've been behaving towards me and when you're ready, I want you to make amends and apologize. My father knows layers that will have this marriage annulled and my money back into my dad's pockets. Do you understand?”

 

Lynn stared at the young bride wide-eyed and speechless. She stood up carefully, mindful not to step too close to either Laura or Alex and quickly made her way out of the room.

 

“Alexandra, are you okay?” Laura asked.

 

“I have never felt better.” she said, looking into the fire.

 

* * *

 

It was five in the morning when Karen and Mrs. Moffat burst into her bedroom.

 

“Milady... milady, wake up please!”

 

“What's going on?” she asked, mind still blurred from sleep.

 

“His Lordship had an accident.”

 

“What?” Alex said, sitting up on the bed.

 

“Mr. Darvil is downstairs.”

 

“His Lordship's valet?” Alex asked confused. “Where's my husband?”

 

“He's down at the local hospital.” Mrs. Moffat said. “Mr. Darvil broke his arm and has a few cuts and bruises, but his Lordship had to be kept at the hospital. The journey strained his condition.”

 

“What condition? Can someone please explain to me what's going on?” she shouted.

 

“Milady?” came a third voice from outside the door.

 

“It's Arthur, milady. Arthur Darvil. I can explain what happened to you.”

 

“Come in, then!”

 

“Milady, you're still in your nightgown.” Mrs. Moffat piped up.

 

“Frankly, Mrs. Moffat, right about now I don't give a fig about being seen in my nightgown.” Alex said, standing up and walking to the door. When she opened it, Mr. Darvil almost fell into the room as if he was leaning against the wooden panels for support. Alexandra reached for him and helped him to the settee.

 

“Thank you, milady.”

 

He looked worse for wear, with his left arm in a sling, a wide cut on his cheek and one side of his face all bruised. Alexandra could swear she heard Karen gulp.

 

“Karen, go fetch some ice from the kitchen and drape a cloth around it then give it to Mr. Darvil.” Alex said, reaching for the clothes her maid had prepared the previous night. “Mrs. Moffat you'll help me get ready, while you, Arthur right? You'll tell me exactly what happened to my husband.”

 

* * *

 

The journey to the hospital took more time than necessary without the car. Alexandra sat on the buggy as the horses walked as fast as the coachman allowed them to. She had made quite a fuss when Mr. Carson had forbidden her to go on horseback. It'd have saved her so much time, less time to spend worrying for her husband's health.

 

As they got closer to the hospital, she recalled what Mr. Darvil had told her. A car accident. They were driving from York towards London when it started raining. The water had caused the path to get slippery and next thing they knew, the car was running around in circles and then rolling down a hill. Lord Smith had insisted that Mr. Darvil sat with him and not with the chauffeur; they had become friends from the first day Mr. Darvil had started working for the family and Matthew abhorred to be left alone in the car, while he and Arthur could easily chat throughout the journey and make time pass.

 

“ _He saved my life” Mr. Darvil had told her “Had I been sitting with the chauffeur, I wouldn't be alive.”_

 

“ _What about the chauffeur?” Alexandra had asked._

 

“ _He didn't make it.”_

 

They were lucky and the rain and stopped before nightfall. Some farmers saw the car and immediately called for help. They were brought to the nearest city and visited by doctors.

 

“ _When his Lordship regained consciousness for a couple of minutes, he insisted he was taken back to Northampton.”_

 

“ _He saved my life, milady.” he repeated._

 

* * *

 

 

There was no one in the street outside the hospital. It was barely sunrise and most people were still in their houses getting ready for their day.

 

When she entered the hospital, the doctor was making rounds but when he saw the young woman and her unfamiliar face, immediately realized she had to be the young American bride of Lord Smith.

 

“Lady Smith, it's a pleasure to finally meet you.” he said. “of course I hoped it would have been under different circumstances.”

 

“The pleasure's all mine” she said politely, offering her hand to the rather young looking man. “Where's my husband?”

 

“He's over there.” the doctor pointed towards the far end of the room.

 

She walked fast towards the screen that separated Matthew from the rest of the patients, giving him a modicum of privacy.

 

Alexandra had prepared herself for the worse, but when she saw him as pale as a ghost, laying unconscious on a tiny hospital bed, it was just too much.


	4. Chapter 4

She didn't move from her spot. Alex's eyes were locked onto Matthew's limp figure a few meters away from her. He was pale, incredibly so and laid completely still in his bed. She couldn't do anything but stare as his chest rose with every painful breath he took.

She felt the doctor come closer, drawing the curtain to give them all a little bit of privacy. He walked towards the patient, checking if anything had changed while he was away. He then looked up at Alexandra silently letting her know that she could come closer.

She let the small purse fall at the end of the bed and stepped closer and closer to her husband. She sat by his side, her fingers immediately tangled with the soft hair falling onto his forehead. Delicately, she raised them from the skin, taking a look at the long, deep cut that was yet to be bandaged, but she saw the meticulous work of the defty fingers of a surgeon's hand in how the stitches were carefully distanced one from the other. The left side of his face was covered in nasty looking bruises and the corner of his mouth was bloody. 

“Other than what you can see, milady, his Lordship has three broken ribs and we had to put his leg in traction during the night. He broke both his tibia and his femur.”

Alexandra nodded. 

“He's going to make a full recovery, milady. There's really nothing to worry about if not the pain he'll be in the next few days.” 

“Can we take him back to the house?” she asked, her eyes still locked onto Matthew's motionless body.

“It's better to wait a couple of days.” the doctor said. “He's heavily sedated right now and will remain so until at least midday.”

“Thank you, doctor.” 

“If there's anything you need, milady, please don't hesitate to ask me or a nurse.”

She nodded her head one more time and remained silent as she gave him a once over and let a lone tear fall down her cheeks.

 

* * *

 

 

Laura was the next one to arrive at the hospital. She had stopped at the abbey for the night, trying to be of moral support for Alex after the discussion the new member of the family had had with the Dowager Countess. Once the older woman had gone, they had a couple of drinks and shared a few interesting stories about their childhood before separating to their bedrooms. They had found a friend in each other and Alexandra was pleased that they were getting along and that both her and Matt would have Laura to be a buffer whenever the former Countess of Northampton was too much for them to handle.

Laura had entered the hospital running as fast and as gracefully as her petticoat allowed her. Her eyes were red and puffy and she had probably skipped breakfast and tea all together, trying to get to her brother as soon as she could. Her eyes were red and puffy from too much crying and they immediately focused on the couple in the far corner of the wide room.

“Alexandra!” she cried, seeing her sister-in-law sitting at the edge of Matthew's bed. “I couldn't get here sooner. With the car out of order and carriage being so slow, it was...” she said, but stopped when Matt groaned, eyes still closed. “Is he awake?” 

Alex shook her head and pressed a cold, wet cloth on his forehead. Matthew seemed to almost lean into the touch, his lips twitching as if he was trying to either smile or say something.

“He's under morphine and apparently he's fighting an infection, which is the least thing we should worry about. He only has a mild fever.” she explained. “The doctor said he broke his leg and three ribs. The cut on his head looks ugly but will heal just fine.”

Laura nodded, walking closer to her brother.

“I sent someone to inform mama.” she finally said. Alex turned around to look at the other woman and they both cringed. That was something they really didn't need at the moment. “I'm going to go ask the nurses for some tea, okay?”

Alex nodded in agreement, but her eyes and mind were still focused on her unconscious husband.

 

* * *

 

 

The dowager countess arrived two hours later, barging into the hospital as if she owned it (which was, in part, true).

“Oh, there you are!” she said, finally noticing where Alexandra and Laura were seated. “I had to find out from your maid where you...” she stopped all of a sudden, spotting Matthew for the first time. “Oh good heavens...” she said, reaching out for the closest thing, a chair, to hold herself up. “My boy...” she said, walking towards him and sitting on the side of the bed. “They told me he was in an accident, but I didn't expect...”

Alex stared as the older woman tried not to shed any tears. She extended a hand and touched her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. Laura watched as the two women interacted, waiting for something to happen.

“He's going to be fine, I know it.” Alexandra then said, focusing one more on Matthew.

“Oh, I know he is.” Lynn said fiercely, shacking the hand off her shoulder.

Alex stared at the woman for a good minute, anger suddenly filling her every bone. Laura sighed and pointed towards the door to the small garden where patients usually were allowed to take a walk into the fresh air. Alexandra gently stood up, gave one last glance at Matthew before walking towards the door and closing it behind her.

“Would you stop that, mama?” Laura scolded her mother.

“Stop what?” the older woman asked.

“You know what! Treating Alexandra like that! She's just as worried about Matty as we all are and the fact that she's new to all our customs isn't helping her into feeling welcome to the family.”

“She is not-”

“Mother!” Laura hissed in exasperation. “Don't you dare say she's not welcome, because what she said last night is true, she saved our family from bankruptcy and I know that with time Matty and her will learn to love each other and everything will be just as you and dad have always wished.” Laura paused. “But you have to be just a little bit understanding and polite towards her.” 

“I-” 

“Alexandrrr...” 

Both women turned to look at the man laying on the closest bed. His face was scrunched up in pain and clear discomfort; his lips were slightly parted, taking one raspy breath after the other.

 

“Doctor!”

 

* * *

 

Alexandra stepped into the cold morning air. She closed the door behind her and was immediately surrounded by the silence of the countryside, chirping birds and the sound of distant horses and other animals.

The woman's nerve, she thought to herself. First she insulted her for the entire engagement to his son, then the two get married and she keeps the attitude going. She insults her daughter-in-law in her own house and now, after what the young woman had said the previous night, she doesn't even show an ounce of respect. How dare she.

Alexandra took a glance from one of the windows, Matthew was still laying in his bed and Laura was clearly talking to her mother, a fierce and angry frown on her face. How she hoped he were awake and hadn't left her alone in the first place. She felt like she was stranded on a secluded island with the only company of a wicked, old woman who hated her guts. Thank god for Laura's sunny attitude.

Alex started walking around the unkempt bushes scattered around the small yard and the wild weeds reaching her ankles. Shooing the thoughts of Matthew's mother and his accident, she tried to focus on the neglected garden. Since she was now looked upon as "her Ladyship", she ought to do something to help the community and what better way than to offer her help with this. Smiling to herself, she made a mental note to talk to the doctor about it.

 

“Alexandra!” Laura was rushing towards her. 

“What's wrong?” 

“He's waking up, love.” she replied with a small smile. “He's asking for you.”

“Me?” Alexandra asked, running past her and back into the hospital. 

 

The doctor was next to Matthew now, as he trashed around as much as he could given his injuries.

“Milord, we need to sedate you again.” the doctor was saying, but Matthew seemed to not pay him any attention.

“Matthew.” Alexandra was finally by his bed, clutching one of his hands in hers. He immediately calmed down, pain still visible on his face. “Hey...” she whispered softly. “I'm here.”

Slowly he opened his eyes, before closing them shut a second later.

“Ugh... light.” he mumbled. The nurses moved immediately into action, drawing the curtains on the closest window and then moving the screen to separate them completely from the other patients. Sensing that no one was moving, Matthew opened his eyes again. This time he took more time, opening one eye and then the other, adjusting slowly to the dim light. Then his eyes locked onto Alex, who smiled encouragingly at him. 

“Hey...” he said. His voice was hoarse and out of reflex, Alex immediately reached for the water jug and the glass sitting on his bedside table.

“Here... take a sip.”

He did so, but as he tried to sit up, he hissed and scrunched his face.

“Bloody hell, it hurts.” he said, causing his mother to scoff and Laura to snort a little. Alex, on the other hand, seemed completely unfazed by his swearing.

“I bet it does.” she calmly said. “This will remind you to never leave me alone with your mother. Ever. Again." 

Matthew would have laughed if his first attempt hadn't failed and turned into a coughing fit. She shushed him and freshened the wet cloth that was still on his forehead.

“Milady, I'm sorry to interrupt but we should give him some more morphine before his condition becomes worse.” the doctor chimed in.

“Can I have two minutes with my wife?” he asked and when the doctor looked at him skeptically, he continued. “I'm going to be fine for two more minutes, it doesn't hurt that bad.”

The doctor nodded his head and motioned for the other two guests to follow him out. Laura elbowed her mother and the two women followed the man behind the screens. After making sure they were out of sight, Matt opened his eyes again and focused on his wife. Alex was staring at him, worry etched on her face.

“You should let the doctor give you the morphine now.”

“No.”

“You can talk to me once you're not in pain. 

“I want to talk to you now, Alex.” he said, using a nickname for the first time. 

“Only my brother calls me that.” she said with a small smile.

“Well, trust me I don't see you in any sisterly way.” he said, coughing a little as he tried not to laugh.

“You sure don't kiss a sister like that.” she said, not even blushing like a any other young bride would have.

“I sure don't.” he said. “I'm sorry.”

“You don't have to feel sorry, Matthew.”

“I left you alone the day after our wedding for some stupid business in the city and look where it got me.”

“You're going to be fine, Matthew.”

“You don't know that.”

“I do.” she said calmly.

They stared at each other for a good minute, neither of them breathing a word. One of her hands moved the wet cloth from his forehead as she checked the cut. Her nimble fingers gently touched the wound. 

“Ouch. That hurts.”

“Sorry.” she whispered apologetically. “That looks like a nasty cut, sweetie.”

“I hope it doesn't leave an ugly scar.” he commented drily. “You already have to put up with _this_ face.”

“I happen to like this face, thank you very much.” she said as another smile graced her lips.

“You do?” 

“I do.”

 

She could see the happiness in his eyes but then it was suddenly obscured by another wave of pain cursing through him. He contorted a little, making the situation worse as he put too much weight on his injured side.

“I'm going to get the doctor.” she said, standing up and rushing towards where the three other people had left minutes ago.

“Alex, wait!”

 

At his strained voice, she turned around.

“When I get out of this hospital, we're going to make this a great marriage, okay?”

Alex bit on her bottom lip. 

“Oh, you ridiculous man.”

And with a smile, she was out of his sight.

 

Matthew closed his eyes and let himself smile fully. He was going to be stuck in here for a while, but at least he had _his Alex_ with him. Suddenly having married her only for money seemed the stupidest of notions.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for making you wait so long. It's a small chapter but at least it's something. The story is not really going how I wanted it to go, it sort of slipped through my fingers and now it's too late to change what I want to change. I'll finish writing it so don't fret :))

Matt spent another two days slipping in and out of consciousness because of the morphine. Those days were spent by the Smith family and mostly Alex, cooped up in the small hospital. He had been given a private room the same day he had arrived on the Dowager Countess' demand. The doctor had simply obliged, not wanting to risk his career and reputation. James Baum, Laura's husband, had joined them that evening, bringing more things for Laura, because apparently she wanted to temporarily move back into the family estate to help her brother out and Alex couldn't have been happier. Laura had proven to be quite the energetic kind of woman, always willing to help everyone out in any way she could and she also was the help Alex needed when managing her mother-in-law.

 

Matt had been sleeping most of the time, conscious for only a couple of minutes every ten hours or so. He'd simply smile at their worried faces, try to calm them and a couple of times he even caressed Alex' face and complimented her. That had caused Laura to snort more than once, joking about how marriage had already made him more docile.

 

“It's not my fault your husband has an ugly mug.” he said then, smirking at James, who merely shook his head and laughed. The two of them had been friends since childhood and when James had finally proposed to the young Lady Laura Smith, Matt had been more than ecstatic about it.

 

He would then drift off, back to sleep for another ten hours before waking up again and so on. It was only then that the doctor decided that they could manage the pain with less medications. Matt began to sleep less and spend more time talking or simply resting with his eyes open.

 

Alex never left his side, except for a couple of times when she had declared that she needed a bath. That was what she expected was the role of a wife when their husband was recovering from an injury, but apparently it wasn't. Alex hadn't missed all the subtle, and not so subtle, hints the Dowager Countess kept giving her and the nurses. The fact that Alex only left Matt's bedside a handful of times was frowned upon by Lynn.

 

It was a relief when the doctor told all of them that Lord Smith could finally be taken up to the house, even if under constant supervision my medical stuff and a daily visit by the doctor. Laura had immediately hugged James, who kissed the crown of her head and smiled at Alex, who was tearing up and beyond exhausted. She looked down at Matt, who was smiling up at her. He squeezed her hand and brought it to his lips.

 

* * *

 

That night, Alex was checking the wound on his forehead as he laid in bed. She had done so twice a day, trusting the nurses who bandaged and medicated him, but not fully. She wanted to check for herself if he was healing nicely.

 

“You're going to have a noticeable scar, I'm afraid.” she said, grimacing a little.

 

“Are you sure you can handle that on my face?”

 

Alexandra looked at him and shook hear head, but smiled.

 

“I'm going to have to look elsewhere whenever we're in the same room.”

 

“I'll make it a habit of going about my day shirtless then.” he replied cheekily. She looked at him and shook her head, claiming to be annoyed but in reality she was amused.

 

“You have run yourself ragged, Alex.” he said then. She was looking down at her hands in her lap, but when his hand went to her chin and made her look up, she saw that he was looking at her worriedly. “You have dark circles under your eyes and you're as pale as a ghost. Eat. Get some sleep.”

 

“But-”

 

“No buts.” he said, moving the covers down a little. “I don't really know if it's proper or not in this situation, but come on... lay down and get some sleep.”

 

“I-”

 

“I'm not going to try anything and we both know that in a couple of minutes I'll be completely knocked out, while you watch over me from the love seat.” he said, patting the space next to him.

 

She hesitated, but after a while and with his help, she removed her corset and gown. Dressed in only a thin, silk camisole she immediately got under the cover, feeling very self-conscious. She snuggled into the covers, bringing them over her chin as he did the same. He couldn't really turn on his side because of his injuries, but he was looking at her with a smile on his face.

 

She smiled back at him before closing her eyes.

 

* * *

 

When she woke up the following morning, she had never felt so rested. Her head was on his shoulder and his arm was wrapped around her waist.

 

She could get used to this.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's my friend Arpita's birthday today and here I am updating this fic as a present for her :)) 
> 
> There's going to be one more chapter and an epilogue! (coming soon, I hope)

The following months were a tame but happy adventure. With Matthew forced to spend most days in bed till his ribs healed enough for him to sit up comfortably, Alexandra tried her best to come up with ways to distract him. His bed rest became a journey of discovery as the couple fell into a routine and started picking up on each other's little habits. He learned she loves drawing and painting, absolutely hates cross-stitching but loved whenever her grandmother would teach her how to knit. She was surprised when he proclaimed he's an avid Shakespeare reader and loves poetry, and less surprised when he said he loves taking long walks with Idris and had named his horse Thom after a singer he had once met in a seedy pub in London.

 

His slow recovery became the engagement and courtship they never really had.

 

* * *

 

Alexandra didn't expect him to say yes when she had asked him if she could help with the hospital's backyard, and she didn't really expect her reaction to be that grand. She had flung herself at him and kissed him on the mouth. When she was back on her feet and looking down, a red rosy blush on her cheeks, Matt had barked out a laugh. She gently slapped his shoulder and sat by his side. He listened as she explained to him her plan, the flowers she wanted to use and maybe she could even manage a small fountain.

 

He had gotten so used to having her around him, fretting about his injuries and his inconstant eating, that letting her go was going to be painful. She had barely left the room since he had moved in there. She was even sleeping there with him since that first night. Not that she hadn't tried to sleep in her own bedroom, but she was so worried about Matt and she had slept so peacefully that night, that the second night since his return, she found herself knocking on his door and climbing into bed next to him. Nothing had happened if not gentle kisses exchanges as a way to say thank you or see you soon. Not that they didn't feel a certain need: she was inexperienced but she nevertheless felt that unusual stirring in her chest and lower whenever she was near him; and he wasn't exactly the chaste little flower. He had had her fair share of adventures just like any other young man of the era. But Alexandra was different. She was his wife and he was slowly but steadily falling for her. And so was she.

 

Upon seeing the look of pure happiness on her face, Matt knew this was going to be good for her. She'd finally get out of the house, do something she liked and help the community that saw her now as Lady Smith. During his stay at the hospital, she had made quite the impression on the patients, their families and the medical staff. Alex had proven herself to be quite the resourceful, caring and kind young woman everyone had always wished for the young Matthew. Everyone was pleased with the new Lady, except for the Dowager Countess.

 

Just the previous day, Matt had gotten into a fight with his mother over Alex and her enthusiasm in taking care of him. Lynn claimed that the servants and the medical staff they had hired was supposed to looked after him, while Alex did the usual things a Lady of her age and social status should do. Matt had obviously defended his wife and the row had ended with an angry Dowager Countess, sauntering down the stairs and into her car.

 

* * *

 

“Read to me.” Matt said, snuggling into the covers and turning around to face his wife. Alex was sitting with her back against the headboard, book in hand. She looked at him and upon seeing his droopy, sleepy eyes, she relented and moved closer. He immediately placed his head in her lap and made himself comfortable. It was becoming a habit, one the two of them was enjoying far too much. After supper and a change of clothes, they would lay in bed reading or Alex would talk about her work at the hospital while he listened till he fell asleep.

 

“You're only going to fall asleep on me.” she said. “Again.”

 

“The medications make me sleepy.” he excused himself before yawning. “Read to me.” he repeated. Alex reopened the book and started reading. One hand held onto the book, the other was playing with her husband's hair.

 

“I gazed awhile, and felt as light and free – as though the fanning wings of Mercury – had play'd upon my heels: I was light-hearted, – and many pleasures to my vision started; – so I straightway began to pluck a posey – of luxuries bright, milky, soft, and rosy.”

 

Six verses and he was already snoring softly. Alex smiled down at him, moving the locks of hair away from his forehead. She gently helped him on his side of the bed, managing only to lay him down in the middle of it. Nevertheless, she smiled and, after resting the book on its usual place on the small table at her side, she laid down too, leaving a fair distance between her and her sleeping husband. Not that it really mattered. From the very first night they had shared a bed, they would wake up in a tangle of limbs and warm skin pressed against other warm skin. It had taken them both by surprise how easy it had been to get used to sharing a bed with another human being. Alex extended her hand slowly, daring to move a lock of hair away from her husband's face. He hummed in his sleep, nuzzling the pillow and shifting imperceptibly closer to her. Suddenly remembering the still lit candle on the bedside table, she turned on her side to blew on it, only to have Matthew unconsciously wrap an arm around her middle. Alex stiffened a little, unsure what to do. But when she looked down at him and saw the faint impression of a smile on his face, she laid back down with a smile of her own.

 

Sleep came soon after.

 

* * *

 

Just like any other day, Matthew woke up with a still sleeping Alexandra in his arms. The sun wasn't even up, but the stitches on his forehead itched and his healing body was making him aware that it was time for his medications. He slowly moved away from his sleeping wife, trying not to wake her. It was the least he could do, letting her rest, as she had been devoting most of her time to him and his recovery since the accident. Reaching for the pills already prepared by Alex the previous night and the glass of water next to them, Matthew downed the pills and the water before laying back down, nuzzling his nose into his wife's hair. He knew that women braided their hair before going to bed; he had seen his sister, mother and aunt doing the same countless times, but Alex was so very different from the other women in his life. He hadn't said anything the first night, but the second time, he had asked her why he didn't braid her hair before going to sleep. His wife had simply rose a perfectly shaped eyebrow and fixed him with a glare. Not that he minded; he had come to love her wild mane of red-blonde curls. He had never dared to touch her hair when she was awake, but he had indulged while she was still in la la land, enjoying the silky ringlets and the way they sprung back to their normal shape every single time he teased them. Still thinking about her hair, he fell back asleep in a matter of minutes.

 

* * *

 

When Alex woke up, there was something different. The sun was slowly entering the room from the tiny spaces the thick curtains couldn't cover. She yawned silently, rubbing her eyes with one hand and stretching her back slowly. Matthew was still asleep next to her, his upper body almost perfectly aligned to hers. And just as she was enjoying the warmth of his body and his soft, gentle, calming snoring into her ear, she felt something prodding against her bottom. She held her breath as she slowly shifted her hips forward, trying to put a little distance between them, only to have him follow her like a magnet. Her overly protective brothers and her maid back in America, had told her about this, about men's reaction to women. Without thinking, Alex darted from Matt's arms and out of bed. He merely stirred.

 

Alex stared at him for a while, before grabbing her robe and exiting the room. She walked down the silent hallway, following the familiar path to one of the numerous bedrooms. The servants were already up and getting the house ready. She spotted her maid, Karen, talking with Arthur, Matt's valet, who in return was smiling widely at the redhead. Alex made a note to inquire about that, once she got her problem sorted out.

 

Once she reached Laura's bedroom, she took a deep breath and knocked. She knew James was there and in other circumstances, Alex wouldn't have disturbed the happy couple, but it was time she had this conversation with the only friend in the house that could understand and help her. James was at the door in seconds, bed hair and sleepy eyes. Upon seeing Alex, he fastened his robe and rubbed the sleep away from his eyes.

 

“Alexandra, is there something wrong? Is Matthew okay?” he asked. Laura was immediately behind him, worry etched on her face.

 

“No, it's fine. He's brilliant.” Alex replied immediately, looking down at her feet. God, she was being so stupid, she thought.

 

“Alex, is everything al right, love?” Laura asked, walking past her husband and cupping Alex's cheek in her hand. Upon seeing that her sister-in-law's eyes were brimmed with tears, he whispered something to James, who nodded and planted a kiss on his wife's head before disappearing back into the room, from which he emerged second later with his clothes, leaving the two women alone.

 

Laura ushered Alex into the room, sitting her down onto the love seat at the foot of the bed.

 

“Want to tell me what's going on, honey?”

 

After a minute of complete silence, Alex looked up and locked eyes with the other woman.

 

“I-” a pause. “Your brother and I-” another pause. “We have never...” Alex took a deep breath and exhaled. “And this morning, he...” a pause. “I felt...”

 

Laura looked at the young bride quizzically for a moment before realization downed on her.

 

“Oh.” she finally said. “What about your wedding night?”

 

“We... never actually had a wedding night.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“That night I waited for Matthew, but he never showed up. The following morning he explained that it would have felt like he was taking advantage of me. He said he wanted to make love to his wife-”

 

“I'm going to kill my brother.” Laura said, standing up.

 

“Laura, no!” Alex stopped her. “He said he wanted to make love to his wife and he assured me that I am indeed his wife, but he said he wanted to know me first, he wanted me to trust him before we did anything. We agreed that we would get to know each other before...”

 

“That's actually quite noble.”

 

“Yes, it is.” Alex agreed.

 

“And you have both hold back for so long? I mean, you have been sleeping in my brother's bedroom since he got back from the hospital.”

 

“How do you know?” Alex asked, looking shocked. Laura laughed.

 

“Honey, everyone knows.” she simply replied. “What happened this morning?” Laura asked, sitting back down next to her friend.

 

“When I woke up, I felt him.”

 

Laura nodded. She had been married long enough to know what Alex was talking about.

 

“And you got scared?”

 

“I think so.” Alex said. “I don't really know what I felt.” she continued, shaking her head.

 

Laura stared at her friend for a while, before standing up and extending both her hands towards Alex. Once she had a firm grip on her hands, she dragged her up with her.

 

“Okay, love. Now... You're going to help me get ready and then I'm going to do the same with you and in the meanwhile I'm going to teach and explain to you a couple of thing I have acquired through the long year I have been married to James.”

 

“Thank you, Laura.”

 

“Don't thank me, sweetheart. That's what I'm here for.” she simply stated, her wide smile making Alex feel a lot better. “Plus I love my brother and I have become rather fond of you too.”

 

She sat down and started brushing her hair gently.

 

“I want the two of you to be happy because I have known from the first moment I saw the two of you that you'd be perfect for each other. You may not know that right now, but you soon will.”

 

Alex smiled softly, more to herself than her sister-in-law. She had been falling for Matthew since the moment he had grabbed her hand and run with her under the rain.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so so sorry for the awfully long wait but as of today I'm back in business! In the last few months I have been pretty busy: I have moved to London mid June and had to get used to my new life! ;p   
> People have been begging me to update and here you go! This is the last chapter before the epilogue! It's not my best work and it feels a bit rushed, but I gave my best! I need to get back into writing as I have been away for way too long a time!

Laura had the power to make all awkward conversations less awkward and more fun. Alex and her spent the entire morning chatting and babbling about this and that, occasionally taking breaks to check on Matthew and James, who were busy in a game of chess but would still fuss every now and then and demand their wives' presence.

 

After lunch, it was more or less an ordinary day for Alexandra. Laura had walked her to the small hospital and helped her out with the garden. The nurses had always been incredibly sweet towards Alex and her sister-in-law, providing them with tea and scones whenever they were free. The hospital's garden was almost complete. Cherry and apple trees were planted, small rose bushes where trimmed and the grass had been mown. In the middle of it though, there as a large, deep hole where a fountain would be. She had asked the community to help out and they had all been happy to oblige the new Countess (if her wide smile and her beauty had something to do with it, no one said a thing). The fountain would be ready in a couple of weeks, but the garden still looked fantastic.

 

At about 4 in the afternoon, Lynn's car stopped in front of the hospital's gate and just like every other Tuesday, the Dowager Countess drove with the other women of the family to the abbey and had tea with them. Matt and James joined every single time too, more to protect Alex from Lynne's sharp comments rather than actually enjoying the older woman's presence. Lynne, on her part, had stopped talking to Alex, much to the latter happiness, but she would still mention her in conversations with Laura and James. Matt, on his end, was giving his mother the silence treatment, only talking to her when asked something directly. Most of the time, he would wheel himself (the doctor had encouraged him to use the wheelchair on his own, trying to rebuild at least part of the muscle mass he had lost during recovery) next to Alex and talk only to her. Alex relished in his attention: she'd smile more, laugh out loud in a very unladylike fashion that simply made Laura join in the laugh fest and Lynn frown. And even though nothing physical had really happened between Alexandra and Matthew, they were hungry for the tiniest of touches, the softest of whispers in one's ear and the gentlest of kisses whenever they thought no one was looking. It was impossible not to notice how the two newly weds were falling for each other.

 

* * *

 

“My back aches.” Matt complained, lifting himself up from the wheelchair before sitting back down onto the bed. Alex was right by his side, assisting him, a gentle yet strong arm around his waist.

 

“Must be from all the sitting down.” Alex said, poking and prodding the cushions behind his back. “Lay down and I'll get you some herbal tea Laura bought you the other day in London. It'll help relax the muscles.” She only had the time to take a step towards the small table by the window before Matthew gently tugged at her wrist, motioning for her to stop.

 

“I don't need Laura's herbal tea.” he said with a small smile as he tugged at her wrist again. Alex smiled back at him and sat down on his side of the bed. She leaned down and pecked his lips.

 

“Come on, scoot over. I'm giving you a massage.”

 

Matthew didn't need to be told twice. He moved forward, using his arms to help with his still injured leg, leaving enough space between his back and the cushions for Alexandra to slide in. Moving his thin shirt out of the way, Alexandra's fingers dogged into the tense muscles of his shoulders and neck. She worked on his back in comfortable silence while Matthew kept his eyes closed, trying his best not to hiss in pain when she manoeuvred her fingers on a particularly tense knot or groan in half pleasure, half pain whenever she would touch that spot between his neck and shoulder.

 

Almost fifteen minutes later, Matt reached for her hand and, mindful of his recently healed ribs, turned slightly towards his wife, capturing her lips in a sweet, innocent kiss.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“You're welcome.” she said, kissing him one more time. His hands let go of hers and moved to fist her beautiful hair, closing the little distance between them. Alex slowly aligned her body with his and they both laid there, souls bared to the other as they kept kissing. It wasn't anything new to either of them, they had done this multiple times before and it had always had this undertone of innocence, but tonight Alex felt a difference. She felt as if her eyes had been opened by her experience that morning and by Laura's gentle, confident explanation. Willing to test what she had learnt only hours before, she carefully moved her hands to his back and under his shirt, nails softly digging into his skin, clinging to him. He groaned against her lips and kept kissing her. It wasn't until one of her legs made its way between his, her thigh grazing against his obvious desire, that he halted and as gently as he could, pushed her away.

 

“What's wrong?” Alexandra innocently asked.

 

“'lex...” he said, shaking his head as it rested in his hands. “We can't.”

 

“Why?” she asked, moving to stand right behind him. Her chest against his back. “We are husband and wife after all.”

 

“You know why.” he whispered. She placed a kiss on his neck.

 

“At least let me help you.” Her nimble fingers grazed across his erection, causing him to jump slightly.

 

“No.”

 

“Matthew.”

 

“The doctor said...”

 

“The doctor cleared you weeks ago...”

 

“I want to make love to my wife. Not-”

 

“I don't care Matthew. I-”

 

“But I do, Alexandra!” he said as loud and clear as a command from a general to a soldier. He hissed in pain as his knuckles hit the bedside table. “I want to make love to my wife.”

 

Alexandra's eyes filled with tears as she walked towards the door.

 

“And I supposed I'm still not that woman.”

 

And with that she left the room.

 

* * *

 

Alexandra barely left her room for the following week, engaging with her in-laws as little as possible and only exiting the house when the people working for her at the hospital needed her input. She had spotted her husband only once as she was making her way to their new car and he was getting out of it with the help of Arthur and Mr. Moffat. She had barely looked at him, but had been fully aware of the way his eyes were fixed on her with a mixture of sadness and guilt.

 

Matthew spent the majority of his days in his bedroom, claiming to being too tired or in too much pain when Laura, James or his mother asked for his presence. From his bedroom's window he manages to catch glimpses of his wife and when the day finally manages to be in the same room with her, she's the one who shies away and leave him standing, or better leaning against Arthur and Moffat, like a miserable idiot. The miserable idiot that he is.

 

* * *

 

Two weeks later, with the help of his best friend (his trustworthy valet) and James, Matthew finally manages to walk on his own . Nine steps out of then he doesn't need to lean or hold onto their forearms to keep himself upright. His heart bursts with happiness. He needs to show Alex. His Alex. Because she's the only reason he can now walk and he's been way too miserable without her by his side.

 

* * *

 

When his eyes finally spotted her, she was shaking Doctor Clarkson's hand, smiling politely at the man as he thanked her for the great work. Matthew took a step forward, Arthur and James right behind him in case he loses balance or whatnot. Laura's eyes are on him, her mouth open in disbelief and tears of joy are streaming down her rosy cheeks. Lynn is nowhere to be seen and Matthew thanks a god he doesn't really believe in. Alexandra is still completely oblivious to his presence, she's looking at the fountain, her fingertips caressing one of the round flowers she had insisted would look perfect near the white marble of the structure. To his eyes, she had never looked more beautiful.

 

People were starting to notice his presence, but he's too focused on his gorgeous bride to care about anyone else. He took another step, then another, as steady as he had ever been. Suddenly someone is clapping his hands, happy that his Lordship has recovered from such a terrible accident without any consequence to his health. A little girl tun towards Alexandra, tugged at her skirts while pointing at him. The smile she gives to the girl before acknowledging the direction the girl was pointing at, has his heart melt. She'd be such a wonderful mother to their children.

 

And then she's looking at him. It took her a while to understand what was going on, but when she finally did, she ran into his arms and planted a kiss on his mouth, tears running down her cheeks and they clang to each other for dear life.

 

“I'm sorry, Matthew.”

 

“No, I'm sorry. I'm a miserable idiot who loves you too much for his own good.”

 

And then she kissed him one more time without a care in the world. And if Lynn had walked into the garden that very instant and her face twisted into a grimace, they were far too busy to notice.

 

 

 


	8. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue!!! Thank you for bearing with me and my mood swings and my inability to update when expected.

_9 Weeks later_

 

Warm bodies and heavy breathing. Delicate touches and throaty whispers of love. That's what greets them almost every morning.

They share a bed every single night, much to Laura's chagrin and Lynn's displeasure. Sharing a bed only for the sake of producing heirs is something Alexandra and Matthew had found truly horrible and had them both ban such custom from their marriage. Sex shouldn't be handled like a business transaction; when two people are in love with each other they should do as they please, Matthew had told his mother after she had found out that her son had stopped using or pretending to use his own bed chamber, preferring to spend the night in his wife's warm bed. 

Moaning softly, Alex extricates herself from the crisp white sheets and snuggles into her husband's side, head resting on his bare chest. His arm doesn't move from around her waist, if not that tiny little amount enough to hold her even closer to him. 

"We have never had a honeymoon." he says, pressing a kiss against her rebellious curls. 

"Oh darling, I don't mind at all."

"But I do."

It's her time now to kiss him, a soft peck just above his heart.

"You have never said but maybe you'd like to go back to America… say hello to your family and friends and flaunt your handsome husband."

"You are my family now. I admit I miss my parents and siblings but being here is starting to feel right." she says, looking up at him. "But the fact that you'd be willing to go to America with me is more than enough."

 

"Well, a trip to America would surely infuriate mama."

"Oh you're terrible. Stop it!"

"Make me."

"Yeah, maybe I will."

"I'd like that."

Their lips meet in a brief kiss and then Alex is lowering her gaze to where her fingers are idly stroking the sparse hair on his chest.

"Plus I don't think leaving now would be a good idea."

"And why's that?" he asks, curious.

"I think we should wait until our child is born." she says softly.

Matthew smiles, chuckles and then freezes.

"P-pardon?" he stutters and then Alexandra is looking up at him, apprehension clear on her face. She simply nods.

Matthew takes a deep breath, then giggles. 

"I think I have just made a grown man giggle." Alex says, happiness now washing over her features.

"Alexandra Smith, I bloody love you."

 

 

The end


End file.
